There once was a young man named Cass
Whose balls were made of spun glass
He'd clang them together
And play "Stormy Weather"
While lightning shot out of his ass
Oh! cabin boy, Oh! cabin boy,
You dirty little nipper
You lined your ass
With broken glass
And circumscised the skipper
There was a young lady named Ransom
Who was ravished three times in a hansom
When she cried out for more
A voice from the floor
Said "Lady I'm Simpson not Sampson!"
An Argentine gaucho named, Bruno
Said "There is one thing that I do Know"
"A woman is fine"
"And a sheep is divine"
"But a Llama is numero uno!"
In days of Old
When knights were bold
And, toilets weren't invented
They laid their loads
Beside the road
And, walked away contented
In days of old
When knights were bold
And women weren't particular
They stood them all
Against the wall
And did it perpendicular